I didn't realize how difficult it would be to maintain this diary when I first started it. It might have been a bit easier if the events in my life were more significant than, say, deciding whether to put one or two spoons full of sugar on my Corn Flakes every morning, or whether to walk in clockwise or counterclockwise circles afterward; but they haven't been.
My life used to be interesting. Some day in the not-too-distant future, it may become interesting again (relatively speaking) -- although it will never again be what it once was (if I do say so myself). If it eventually improves one percent, or even three percent, I guess I'll count that as a positive event.
That being said, I'm not a big fan of the aging process. For me, looking on the bright side, as far as the future goes, is like waiting patiently for the band on the Titanic to play my favorite song.
For eleven months now, I have put a fair amount of pressure on myself to write these diary entries, even though subject matter is scarce. As you can see, I haven't been very successful (there are also a lot of bungled entries cluttering my hard drive). If I were a gifted prolific writer, as some of you are, this would be easy. But I'm not. Writing well, for me, is hard work (even this entry is causing me a lot of trouble). For some time now, I've realized that I should be focusing all that hard work on my favorite offline projects, the ones that have been important to me for as long as I can remember. They have suffered severely in the past few years. Therefore, I believe it's time for me to take an official break from this online diary stuff for a while (my many unofficial breaks in recent months were spent trying to write entries, so they don't count). Only time will tell if this official break is permanent. Presently, I have no idea.
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I will leave you with the following thought: Shortly after writing the above four paragraphs last night, I watched Finding Neverland, starring Johnny Depp. If you want to know the sort of inspired character I used to be -- the sort of inspired writer I used to be -- watch that movie. It will tell you more about me than I could ever hope to do in my own words.
